So, it’s still very early days but we’ve finally got the kids sharing a room together!
Before the transition, quite a few parent friends had warned against room sharing so I was a little apprehensive about how it would go and at the risk of jinxing everything (we’re only 5 nights in!), I have to say, so far, it’s been surprisingly smooth. Here’s a few of my thoughts on what has helped, in case it’s useful for anyone looking to do the same..
Definitely the fact that both kids were sleeping independently (and well) before the move has helped. I wouldn’t recommend anyone to do this if either child still has regular sleep challenges. Address those first or you’ll just have them waking each other up.
Also, at the same time as moving the kids in together, we swapped our master bedroom with what was previously Sira’s room so the kids have more space for a joint bedroom / playroom. It was a bit of a happy accident but I think this gave us the added bonus of Eli already being familiar with his room (since he’s not moved anywhere).
I think age also worked in our favour. Sira is 4 years old and mature enough to understand and respect the boundaries that need to be in place for successful room-sharing. To the point that we even have Eli’s cot right next to Sira’s bed as we know there is no risk of Sira attempting to play with him during the night or putting anything that could be dangerous into his cot. I suspect this would be much more challenging with a toddler and baby and you’d need more space (or a screen) between the beds. Likewise, Eli is old enough that he sleeps through the night with no night feeds. For younger babies I suspect you’d need to get to them pretty quickly to avoid their crying waking up the older sibling. Fortunately it wasn’t an issue for us but If Sira had been younger and still taking a nap I would continue to do those in separate rooms, as daytime sleep is much more challenging.
We had also prepared Sira for the change by talking about it for several months before it happened. She was involved in preparing their new room and excited about finally having her little brother for company. Whilst I miss having Eli in with us I love knowing that they are together so it’s been easier on me too.
We debated staggering bedtimes to have Eli into bed and settled before getting Sira into bed but given that both Eli and Sira usually settle relatively quickly, when it came to the first night, we just did our usual bedtime routine and got both of them into bed same time. We half-expected a bit of mischief given the novelty of it all or at least for them both to take longer to fall asleep but to our surprise, there were no issues and it was as if we hadn’t changed anything at all! I can see how this could be useful though for younger children or children that generally take longer to settle.
So that’s pretty much it for now! It’s still pretty fresh and I’m sure we’ll have ups and downs along the way (illness, more teeth etc!) so we still have a bed in a separate room for those times. But so far it’s been a good experience. Definitely the age of your children will influence what approach will work best for you, but I hope this gives you a few starter ideas to consider.
No responses yet