Toddlers. What an exciting and fascinating phase. Born boundary-pushers, newly independent and
endless energy and mischief! To these little people, the world is an exciting, big science experiment and
there is little time to sleep (for you or them!). However, toddlers need 12-14 hours sleep per 24 hour
period and it can be incredibly challenging for some children. As toddlers navigate the world around
them, they face a massive learning curve and with all that new-found knowledge, also comes greater
independence and autonomy. Cue power struggles! This is a completely normal and important
developmental phase and it’s about testing where your boundaries as the parent lie and how much
authority they actually have.
Of course, power struggles are not exclusively linked to sleep. To the contrary, they happen throughout
day and night, it’s just that clearly they can make sleep and particularly bedtime somewhat of an
exhausting challenge! Stalling tactics often come into play in a massive way at this age. More stories, a
glass of milk, game playing, toilet trips interspersed with non-stop chatter and claims of “I’m not tired!”
suddenly become the norm. Bedtimes can get longer and more demanding and with every successful
request comes the curiosity and confidence for the toddler to ask for even more.
So what’s the good news?.. Well toddlers tend to see the world in black and white. Whilst it might not
seem like it in the moment, they actually take a great amount of comfort in knowing that you, the
parent, are firmly in charge and are confident in your decisions. It gives them a sense of security.
So my top tip is to put in place a short, bedtime routine and stick to it like glue. It needs to be absolutely
predictable every night no matter who is in charge of bedtime. I’m not saying this will be easy. Sticking
to the routine can be a challenge because they’re going to ask, test and complain, but if you’re gentle
and consistent, they’ll understand sooner rather than later that the bedtime routine is not up for
debate.
A predictable, repetitive bedtime routine is also really conducive to a good night’s sleep. It signals the
brain to start secreting melatonin and the body to start relaxing muscles in preparation for a restful,
relaxing snooze.
So whilst we can’t actually make a toddler fall asleep, when it comes to sleep and what happens during
the night, we can also help by setting:
- Clear, consistent expectations,
- Structure & predictable routine
- Positive consequences and rewards
If you want to hear more or need a little support on the sleep front, get in touch! In the meantime, a big
shout out to all parents of toddlers. Now, time for a coffee, you deserve it!
No responses yet